National Association of Adult Survivors of Child Abuse

National Association of Adult Survivors of Child Abuse

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NAASCA Highlights
- Feature Articles -
EDITOR'S NOTE: Here we present a few recent stories and feature articles from a variety of sources that are related to the kinds of issues we cover on our web site and mission. They represent a small percentage of the information available to us, the public, as we fight to provide meaningful recovery services and help for those who suffered child abuse. We'll add to and update these pages regularly, bringing you just a few of the articles and resources available on the web site.
HOME PAGE
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a little about us
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Feature Story Archives - 2019
presentations from a variety of sources on
issues of child abuse and trauma
 
Archives from other years:
- 2011 - 2012 - 2013 - 2014 - 2015 -
- 2016 - 2017 - 2018 - 2019 -
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  It's Raining Men

by PK Hill, NAASCA Ambassador at Large

There is so much going on in my life I can barely keep track of it all. I have calendars that have calendars. I feel totally overwhelmed. This Advocacy role is not for weaklings. There is much happening in my Fight for Justice and at the same time, I feel like I am in a Holding Pattern of Healing and nothing is happening.

Once again the other day during an interview that has yet to air on TV I cried on camera. I am so sick of crying on camera. I have little patience for tears unless they are someone else's and then I am filled with Compassion and Concern. When do the feelings of grief and loss dissipate for Survivors of CSA? When do Survivors of sexual abuse by pedophiles; Nuns, Priests, Teachers, Neighbors, Family members, Etc, when do we get to heal? Why do the Predators get to walk away from the scene of crime unscathed and we, the victims, have to carry the scars of the abuse for a lifetime? And why are there so many people who fail to understand the depth of the harm done to a child who has been raped and molested, abused and confused, used and disposed of?

I have been stuck in this emotional place for several days feeling a lot of anxiety about the last few interviews… wishing I had said more, or less, about certain subjects, people and circumstances. There is a lot of stress involved in speaking the damage out loud in public. Did I help my Brother and Sister Survivors by the words I shared or did I do harm?

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  from Psychology Today

Why Adult Victims of Childhood Sexual Abuse Don't Disclose

Six reasons why adult victims of child sexual abuse continue to keep the secret.

by Beverly Engel L.M.F.T.

As the recent HBO documentary entitled Leaving Neverland so powerfully demonstrated, there are many adults who have yet to tell anyone that they were sexually abused as a child—not their partners, not their friends, not their family members, often not even their therapist. Many of us are familiar with the reasons why children do not come forward to report child sexual abuse, but many don't understand why adults continue to carry this secret, sometimes to their graves. I have been counseling adult victims of child sexual abuse for the past 35 years. In this article I will discuss many of the reasons why some adults continue to keep silent when it comes to being a victim of child sexual abuse.

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Migration
  Migration

by Teresa Joyce, NAASCA representative in the United Kingdom

In 2011 after many years of considerable thought, I found the determination and strength in which to be able to write and publish my book “There's a fine line” The journey that I was about to embark on in truth could lead me anywhere but I was just so very tired of standing still.

It was a difficult process for sure but until I found movement in using my own direction I would never really know. What was completely clear was that I had to deal with the residue of my emotions. Emotions within me, that were still holding fast to their power and they had the ability to tie me up in knots inside. If I'm honest they had me within a continual place of circling. Questioning my abuse within that circle and as we are aware a circle has no end.

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Pope Francis: Must protect children
from 'ravenous wolves'
  Meeting "The Protections of Minors In the Church"
Address of His Holiness Pope Francis


by Bill Murray

I am posting this speech by Pope Francis, owing to the tremendous interest in the results of the just ended historic clergy abuse summit at the Vatican.

I've also added the related articles that came from those who attended / participated in the four day event at the end of February, 2019.

from the Vatican - (several videos on site) -- Read the Pope's entire speech blasting sexual abuse within the church -- included are multiple links to additional related stories from the week

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Oprah audience - "Leaving Neverland" interviews   A Personal Note
on HBO's "Leaving Neverland"

from Anthony Edwards, Vice Chair, Board of Directors
1in6.org

Dear 1in6 Family,

I wanted to take a moment and send a personal note to share a powerful and moving experience from this past week.

On Wednesday, I had the incredible honor of joining an audience of survivors of sexual abuse, as well as others whose lives have been impacted, for a special screening of the two-part documentary "Leaving Neverland," which will premiere this Sunday, March 3rd and Monday the 4th on HBO.

The documentary introduces two incredible men, both survivors of sexual abuse, Wade Robson and James Safechuck.

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  Educating Parents On The Reality of Child Sexual Abuse

by Adrian Perry, Survivors United

No mother or father wants to think their child could ever be sexually abused. It's one of those “worst nightmares” that parents may find themselves briefly thinking about, but it's also that one thing that parents think will never happen to their child. Why after all, you are a fantastic parent who never leaves your child with people you don't know or trust. You watch your child like a hawk. You have or will have that body awareness talk with your child that everyone talks about, but no one really knows how to go about it. Well, moms and dads, it is time for a major wake-up call when it comes to child sexual abuse and the reality behind it.

One in four girls are sexually abused and one in six boys are sexually abused during their childhood. The scary reality is that in the majority of child sexual abuse cases, the child knows their abuser, and often times, they know their abuser VERY well. We have this false idea that a child predator is the creepy looking man that is just waiting to snatch your child. This couldn't be further from the truth. The real-life child predator can be your child's teacher, coach, friend, friends' parent, friends' older sibling, pastor, babysitter, mom or dads' friend, a family member, and the list goes on. 

A child predator typically knows the parents. In order to gain access to your child, they have to get through two major doors. Door number one and door number two are Mom and Dad. Once they have the parents trust, they have the child's trust.

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  PTSD and Complex Trauma

by Teresa Joyce, NAASCA representative in the United Kingdom

It's a much talked about corundum and something that can be incorrectly diagnosed but experiencing these two mental health symptoms is so very different, post traumatic stress disorder is mostly as the result of a specific episode an individual subjected to the horror of rape or being witness to a horrific act or incident. All of which can take someone to a place of a complete breakdown with the outcome that mental health intervention is sorely required.

For the most, it can be related to a singular experience by the individual concerned which of course doesn't make it less horrendous. Even if experienced over a prolonged period of time i.e. soldiers returning home bringing with them the images they have been subjected to within a war situation, though it could have been experienced over a longer space of time whilst on deployment, it's a singular episode and unbroken.

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  Complex Trauma

OPINION


by Teresa Joyce, NAASCA representative in the United Kingdom

All abused children will reach a point in their life hopefully in which their painful memories will need to and are able to be addressed, a place where they will have to come to terms with the horrific atrocity that they were subjected to. The only unanswered question left can only be as to when?

The only one who is truly able to answer that question is that child, that inner child that until now has been in hiding away from the world and may not feel strong enough to do so just yet. The journey of going within to engage with that pain takes timing child abuse survivors around the world that I have engaged with have always related to that statement as to bring their truth, but also that we should never have truly underestimated that child's strength just look how far it has already taken them but yes it also takes time.

We will never really be able to feel that strength within until they connect with their inner child from the outside, but it will be the hardest thing that they will ever have to do by taking that first step it's like walking into the abyss.

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Matt Carey speech -- The White Hat Ball
The Royal Lancaster Hotel
London -- Jan 19, 2019
  The White Hat Ball Talk
The Royal Lancaster Hotel, London
January 25, 2019

by Bill Murray -- #metooCSA

Matt Carey is from London, England (UK), a NAASCA family member who spoke recently at a major event, The White Hat Ball. We appreciate all his in our efforts, including a recent appearance as a 'special guest' on our "Stop Child Abuse Now" talk radio show.

Click here if you'd like to hear his interview:

Stop Child Abuse Now (SCAN) - 1908 -- Special guest Matt Carey -- Wed, 6/27/2018

As Matt explains, "It has been the years of working the 12 Step program, regular meditation, the life-changing support I’ve received from my fellow CSA survivors, and the expertise of several highly gifted professional therapists has helped me to change [my] inner narrative."

Matt also offered us a terrific article he wrote recently, "Trying to Make Sense of It All," describing what it was like, what happened and what it's like now.

Of his book, "A Small Boy Smiling," Matt writes, "My hope is that fellow survivors of trauma and addiction might find hope and encouragement to find the help they so desperately need to heal."

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  What inspires followership? Trust, empowerment, and the truth.

by Matt Paknis

As a college football coach and then as a manager, responsible for overseeing and influencing the daily actions and behaviors of up to sixty people, as a sports captain in high school and in college and even as the president of the “animal house” in college when we became the first fraternity to return to campus housing after losing this privilege, and then working around for the globe with leaders to help them inspire followership, a few best practices emerged.

•  It's all about trust
•  Ownership and involvement
•  Address difficult and emotional issues constructively

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  How To Talk To Your Kids About Sexual Abuse

Looking back on the Larry Nassar scandal, we spoke to experts about how to address these difficult issues with kids of all ages.

by Caroline Bologna

This article is the fifth installment of “One Year Later: Larry Nassar And The Women Who Made Us Listen,” a seven-part series that commemorates the seven days women stood in a Lansing, Michigan, courtroom last year and faced their abuser, former USA Gymnastics and Michigan State trainer Larry Nassar.

Read more installments
:
One | Two | Three | Four | Six | Seven

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  Keeping Children Safe Online

An article suggested by NAASCA family member Louise Smith

The internet is such an omnipresent part of modern life that it comes as second nature to our children. While many of us are still getting to grips with the online world, children are born into it.

This can be a great thing. If a curious child has a question, the answer is only ever a Google search away. Naturally, however, this is not always a good thing. Anything that can be used for good can also be exploited – especially where children are concerned. There is a fine line between innocence and naivety.

It's important that we keep our children safe online. Thankfully, even though the internet can appear to resemble a lawless Wild West at times, there are a number of steps that we can take to do just this.

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  Healing from, and ending, Childhood Sexual Abuse

Key Points from my 1-4-19 interview with NAASCA

by Matt Paknis

It was very edifying to talk with NAASCA's Bill, Mary, Carol, and Bobby on Friday night. Thank you for this opportunity.

Below please find a few points culled from the interview and in reflection to help adult survivors of childhood sexual abuse integrate and transcend their significant childhood traumas.

EDITOR'S NOTE: Here is a link to the "Stop Child Abuse Now" talk radio show where Matt appeard in early January: Stop Child Abuse Now (SCAN) - 2045 -- Special guest Matt Paknis

Early intervention with a great counselor, deep love from my ailing mother and her friends, stopping the abuse, healthy involvement in sports, and in particular with football, great coaches, role models, teammates, and my striving for mental, physical, emotional, and spiritual health helped me transcend long term exposure to four major childhood traumas; experiencing and witnessing domestic violence, sexual abuse, and the terminal illness and death of my young mom.

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Happy New Year !
  In the New Year

by Teresa Joyce, NAASCA representative in the United Kingdom

A new year has just begun where we will say goodbye to the old. We reminisce on the year that has now past us by. During this year we have encountered many things and, as always, they are stored away in our memory.

The passing of time happens and there is nothing that we can do to alter it, but the one thing for sure is that this trend will continue until we leave this world.

I'm not trying to write an obituary here. I am only stating the obvious of which is no surprise to anyone. This is the cycle of life. Some may even feel and believe 'bad' experiences will be repeated, as there are still life lessons that we need to complete within this realm.

Whatever we believe is for us to know and to be at peace with. But in the here and now we have to live within what we were given, we must strive to fulfil our dreams and find happiness .. which can be found in the most unexpected places.

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Darryl Smith
  Sexual abuse survivor Darryl Smith to share his story at the Vatican

by Adele Redmond

A survivor of sexual abuse within the Catholic Church will share his story at the Vatican.

Dunedin man Darryl Smith will meet with Catholic bishops, and potentially Pope Francis, during a global summit on clergy sexual abuse in Rome in February.

Smith claims he was first abused as a 6-year-old at Christchurch's Marylands School, a Catholic institution for children with learning difficulties, in 1971.

"The Pope has stated publicly that he wants the bishops to meet the survivors," Smith said on Saturday.

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  An Open Letter to Those who Love Someone Struggling with PTSD or Trauma

by Sarah Harvey

Because I know trauma intimately, I forget that some people don't.

And I would never wish that thundering darkness on anyone.

But I hate feeling misunderstood. I think many of us do.

To most people, I look fine—maybe I seem a bit awkward in moments—and now, after many years of hard inner work, I am fine. I feel like myself. I feel real and whole, intact—stitched together again.

But there are still stories that lie under the surface of my skin.

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  The Art of Processing

by Teresa Joyce, NAASCA representative in the United Kingdom

It's something that we all have to do daily to enable us to settle within that place surrounding our abuse, because there's no avoiding process, a place that we are taken whilst initiating our thoughts looking towards our recovery. The speed or manner in which we do so is so completely varied and it is as individual as we are and it's to be expected.

We'll all go through this procedure in a way in which we are able to digest and absorb and in a time frame that suits us, there is no hurrying the wind or pushing the tide it's what's right for us and our ability to face that in which we find ourselves faced with.

We cannot expect any help to be available within this situation because that's just not how it works, no one could hope to work with you at the exact speed that suits when it doesn't suit them and their own speed of travel. In essence, our mental processing is just that it's ours and unfortunately eventually that's where the buck stops because it has to.

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.
HOME PAGE
programs / projects
RECOVERY
together we can heal
RESOURCES
help stop child abuse
ABOUT
a little about us
CONTACT
join us, get involved